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Hoses of the Holy in the Parallel Universe

March 17, 2005


Those of you who know me will remember that due to an adminstrative error in 1996 I have nightmares with taxation.

Every year I have to complete a 75 page form in full to try and sort things out and it always ends up with me having to pay about £200 (say $300).

This year I thought, "fuck it" because I was certain they owed me money. I filled in the forms and sent them off and thought, "I'm not paying jack shit".

Sure enough, yesterday I received a letter from them. They explained that they owed me £197.63, and it would be paid directly into my bank account.

However, this morning I received another letter stating that my employer had underpaid tax on my behalf last year to the sum of £2 exactly. This should have been paid by the 31st January this year. However, since I had failed to make this payment in time I have been fined £100.

I'm not surprised really. For those of you abroad - that's what England is like: sort of quite averagely not very good and cocked-up.


  • Please tell me you're going to appeal against this draconian treatment? You've just reminded me that I ought to declare some stuff this year, except I've completely failed to keep any financial records, as usual.

    By Blogger bot37363838, at 3:48 am  

  • Nah. Better to keep your nose down and take the hit in the hope that they'll get bored and move on to pick on someone who tries to fight back.

    I appealed two years ago. I ended up having to pay an additional £100 that time.

    It's like complaining to Nero that the dancers are a bit unsophisticated at a banquet he's organised. Or sticking your head in a lion's mouth.

    No point in putting yourself at the mercy of a ruthless power unnecessarily.

    I recognise that they are ruthless and inefficient but, crucially, omnipotent.

    By Blogger SimonHolyHoses, at 4:14 am  

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