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Hoses of the Holy in the Parallel Universe

January 24, 2006

Had it all

Yes, in terms of cunts driving cars I've had it all this morning. Speeding down bus lanes, overtaking on the inside, using slip lanes to cut me up, tailgating. In fact, the entire spectrum of human selfishness.

The traffic recently (since last week) has been bad. It's down to three things: a) Roadworks on the A60 at Ruddington (so people who use that route are diverting to another already overloaded trunk route); b) a new set of traffic lights on a pedestrian crossing on Farnborough Road in Clifton; c) A new zebra crossing on Southchurch Drive in Clifton. You wouldn't think it but these three little things have turned a reasonable journey into a queueing nightmare. That's chaos for you innit. Anyway, it's not just my dwindling fuel that they are pointlessly pissing into the atmosphere.

The only positive aspect was that there had been a head on collision just outside the village. Another one of those bends on which, in spite of being blind, drivers cut the corner in order to avoid slowing down. When I got there, there was a blue car half way up a tree down the railway embankment. There was another sort of metallic lime car in the hedge on my side with the front caved-in and no front wheels. There was glass, plastic and metal all over the road. And a wheel, complete with suspension, halfway up the hedge. Unfortunately both drivers (young and male) seemed not to have been harmed and were both on their mobiles, gesticulating. Twats!

So then, this sort of thing only serves to remind me how much I despise these sort of people.

All of you chimp-men who do this sort of inhumane, pissy, conniving, snatching, scraping, bullet-shitting, stick banging, crafty yet stupid, red-faced, small-minded, selfish, useless, shit-in-your-pants-to-save-a-walk-to-the-toilet behaviour: I have this to say; "You are useless, not even a human being, and everything you do is a waste of existance. I rejoice in the fact that nomatter what you do, you are going to die and every tiny thing you do has been a waste of your efforts."


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