Everyone's a Critic revisited

watched the second episode of NY-LON last night - live, so there was no avoiding the freaking adverts, which made it even more annoying, somehow.

Here's what I think. With yet more non-dialogue and yet more "meaningful" shots of cityscapes and of her (Natalie Wood-alike) walking through streets looking soulful while some MTV music played, it became obvious that NY-LON is simply a marketing exercise aimed at soundtrack CD sales. And whaddaya know, no sooner had the end credits started, they were plugging the soundtrack record.

Who writes this crap? I was thinking of ER, I was thinking of NYPD Blue, of Homicide, of CSI. The dialogue that never stops, the brilliant pacing, and -- crucially -- meaningful looks between well-established characters that actually mean something.

There's some blonde bird, she's Sideburn Nutter's ex-girlfriend-ish, who is pregnant and supposedly in love with him (though her way of showing it was to lie to him about birth control and then emotionally blackmail him with a pregnancy). I can't, for the life of me, place her accent. What is she supposed to be? She sounded Irish, Welsh, French, German, Scandinavian, Spanish - all the nations of Europe, all at the same time. I kept expecting her to wave the EU flag and start talking about farming subsidies.

And NatalieWood-alike's ex boyfriend, the Ryan Adams in-a-band type, what about him? I suspicion that if you wanted to write something like this well, this guy would be a charming rogue, perhaps a little bit dark, but full of life and excitement and irresistibly attractive. But instead he's a complete tosspot, a wanker of the first order, so there's no dramatic tension whatsoever - unless you're asking yourself, why is Natalie such a magnet to nutters? Is the plot going to take a dark turn, and she will be murdered soon?

The verdict, for Channel 4's benefit, should there be any doubt: it's SHITE.