Kill Me Now
See, there's a very good reason why I am not cut out for the routine maintenance of a modern motor vehicle.
This is what I was telling myself as I was crawling around on the floor in the dark this evening, underneath my car, attempting to see what I was doing by means of a torch consisting of a single, solitary light emitting diode, the very kind of torch, in fact, that is designed to help you find a lock with your key in the dark.
Many years ago, when I started driving, I was used to changing the oil and air filter element in my car, a VW Type 1 Beetle. Had to change the oil every 3000 miles, you see, so you better had learn to do it yourself. I could adjust my plug gaps, as well, so I wasn't completely incompetent.
I'm still not afraid of lifting the bonnet and having a look around. I check my fluid levels, that sort of thing. But you can't see a lot in the modern car. You especially can't see a lot when you decide to check your oil in the dark.
Turns out the oil did need a top up, and I did that. Then I was fumbling with my "torch" in the dark, so I could see what I was doing with the filler cap, and dropped the filler cap into the engine compartment.
Now, in an older model car, this might have just clattered down to the ground. But your modern car has a plastic cover underneath the engine, so the filler cap just got stuck down there hiding underneath the fan belt, completely inaccessible.
My torch was a vendor freebie, a novelty item useful for attaching to your key ring, but it turns out to be the only working flashlight we have in or around the house. So I had to use that to look through the garage for tools so I could remove the plastic bottom cover (except it wouldn't come off) and fumble around, trying to squeeze the filler cap through the small gap I was able to create.
The LED torch is actually quite bright, considering, and if you use it for its intended purpose, but it's a pretty feeble light when you're undoing nuts and screws underneath your car, putting your hand in squidgy muddy bits on the path and inflicting a series of minor injuries upon your fingers.
Still, I'm quite proud, in the end: didn't have to call Volkswagen Emergency Assistance and ask them to come and retrieve my filler cap for me.
This is what I was telling myself as I was crawling around on the floor in the dark this evening, underneath my car, attempting to see what I was doing by means of a torch consisting of a single, solitary light emitting diode, the very kind of torch, in fact, that is designed to help you find a lock with your key in the dark.
Many years ago, when I started driving, I was used to changing the oil and air filter element in my car, a VW Type 1 Beetle. Had to change the oil every 3000 miles, you see, so you better had learn to do it yourself. I could adjust my plug gaps, as well, so I wasn't completely incompetent.
I'm still not afraid of lifting the bonnet and having a look around. I check my fluid levels, that sort of thing. But you can't see a lot in the modern car. You especially can't see a lot when you decide to check your oil in the dark.
Turns out the oil did need a top up, and I did that. Then I was fumbling with my "torch" in the dark, so I could see what I was doing with the filler cap, and dropped the filler cap into the engine compartment.
Now, in an older model car, this might have just clattered down to the ground. But your modern car has a plastic cover underneath the engine, so the filler cap just got stuck down there hiding underneath the fan belt, completely inaccessible.
My torch was a vendor freebie, a novelty item useful for attaching to your key ring, but it turns out to be the only working flashlight we have in or around the house. So I had to use that to look through the garage for tools so I could remove the plastic bottom cover (except it wouldn't come off) and fumble around, trying to squeeze the filler cap through the small gap I was able to create.
The LED torch is actually quite bright, considering, and if you use it for its intended purpose, but it's a pretty feeble light when you're undoing nuts and screws underneath your car, putting your hand in squidgy muddy bits on the path and inflicting a series of minor injuries upon your fingers.
Still, I'm quite proud, in the end: didn't have to call Volkswagen Emergency Assistance and ask them to come and retrieve my filler cap for me.
posted by Anonymous at
Monday, November 07, 2005
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