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Hoses of the Holy in the Parallel Universe

April 20, 2005

bob's big brain and the fuckworthiness game

rob's got a much bigger brain than most people. that's why he is able to make long lists of things he needs to do, while simon can only manage one thing. i'm with simon on this. because my brain is small, and because i've got a mild phobia about lists. there are a number of reasons for this phobia:

1. my general child of the universe state resists order
2. ...no, i can't do it.

anyway, rob also utilises his superior powers when playing the outrageous fuckworthiness game. we all do it, don't we? walking down the road on a sunny day, appraising approaching potential fuck partners. it's all pie in the sky, of course, with the massive assumption that these creatures would look twice at superannuated slobs like us. rob has the capacity to rate them on a scale of one to ten. i'm a binary man, myself. a "yes i would" or "no i would not" does the trick for me.


  • Actually the scale is from 0 to 5. I saw the futility of a 1-10 scale, when the numbers 1-5 were merely different shades of people you wouldn't be interested in.

    Anyway, mine's not so much about fuckworthiiness; it's about life-partnership, companionship, love, romance, hanging out together etc. I wouldn't be so crude.

    0 - not interested.
    1. Interested, but only with props like paper bag on head or sock in mouth
    2. Interested, no need for props
    3. Very interested, would consider chatting up
    4. Too interested, would definitely chat up and hope to "share intimacy".
    5. It's the 3-alarm fire - someone you'd throw your life away for, do dumb things in the name thereof, run away to Vegas with for a quickie divorce and/or marriage.

    Basically, with this scale, you hope you never meet a 5. With careful consideration, very very few people warrant a 5. Most people are 0-2. It's a fact of life.

    By Blogger bot37363838, at 1:12 am  

  • Here, by way of a public service, is a link to my long-ago entry about The Scale.

    I think it works as well whatever your sex or sexuality.

    By Blogger bot37363838, at 4:00 am  

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