Not as easy as you'd think

O no, Mr Frodo
Don't do that to me
Don't slip on the ring
Don't hide in a tree
I'll search Middle Earth till I find you
I'll crawl across rocks and through woods
I'll fight every foe I'll never give up
I'll beat Gollum senseless till he tells me
People say we're homo-erotic
That's because they misunderstood
That the love of a man for his servant
Or vice versa as the case may be
Is a love that is noble and good