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Hoses of the Holy in the Parallel Universe

April 05, 2006

25 years later


In France, you know, it's only just 1981.

That was the year of the riots. I was living down near Herne Bay at the time, an idyllic period for me, and I was unemployed. The national crisis got to such a state that there were rumours, one day, that there were going to be riots in Canterbury. Shopkeepers were boarding up their windows. Old ladies were hoarding toilet rolls and sugar.

I cycled down there. That was my way of getting around in those days. Those bloody Canterbury hills! Anyone who knows the town will appreciate what I'm talking about. I was so fucking fit in those days! We lived on a long, mostly empty country road. I had a bike then, it only had 5 gears, but it was so well balanced, you could ride without holding the handlebars for miles and miles. I used to turn off the main road, let go of the handlebars, and just freewheel, mostly, all the way down to our house.

It was so quiet, I could probably have read a paperback book, like people do in the gym.

Anyway, I cycled down to Canterbury on the day of the rumoured riots. There were a few boarded up shops, but there was nothing going on.

What the French need, to diffuse the situation, is a big Royal Wedding. So, find the heir to the French throne, re-institute the monarchy, fix up an engagement, and then give everyone the day off for the wedding. Voila. It's a sure-fire formula.

p.s. In the caption to the photo above, Charles is saying, "Threesome?"

2 Comments:

  • Cool post.

    We've got no TV: what's happening in France?

    By Blogger SimonHolyHoses, at 2:38 am  

  • They're having riots, because of some new youth unemployment law. These follow on from their race riots of last year. What price retirement in France now, eh, middle class British people?

    By Blogger bot37363838, at 2:47 am  

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