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Hoses of the Holy in the Parallel Universe

April 12, 2006

Movie Pitch

I've had this idea for a film. It's a version of The Graduate, but set in the 18th Century. The Dustin Hoffman character is the oldest son of a family who have joined the United Society of Believers, a Quaker splinter-group based in New England. Principally known for their ritual communions with the dead and their ecstatic shaking movements, they're also known as the Shakers. It rhymes with Quakers, don't you know.

At this young man's graduation party, a stranger from the future sidles up to him and says, "Just one word: kitchens."

I couldn't help noticing, as I was browsing an on-line furniture catalogue the other day, that they were offering a Shaker Coffee Table. I wanted to phone them up and ask, "They drink a lot of coffee, then, these Shakers? Coffee mornings and all that kind of thing was it? Very nice. But what on earth did they keep their TV on, back in the 18th Century?"


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